When it comes to characteristics, what is Feminine and what is Masculine? Well, I will try to keep this one short and sweet but I can’t promise that I won’t run off at the mouth as usual. You see I’m like Pringles, once I start, I just can’t stop!
For many years I’ve listened to people and seen how society has created their narrow views. I’ve seen people fear to act out in the ways they most desire and I’ve heard people say the things that they deem to be sociably acceptable but I am cut from a very different knife. I stay true to me by being me.
I’ve often heard people say he or she is “too feminine” or not “masculine enough”. But from young I’ve questioned what is really feminine & masculine?! From the age of 7 when I developed my own sense of style, I was branded a ‘tomboy’. All I ever wore was sneakers and tracksuits. I was in my element in the clothing I considered to be of my upmost comfort and which expressed my personality, sporty and active. As I got older and realised that by me wearing skirts shifted me into the feminine bracket and me wearing jogging bottoms put me into the masculine bracket I was genuinely concerned. How could what I wore which is my self expression determine how feminine I was? Well for the protection of your ears or shall I say eyes, I won’t ramble off into my many opinions, I’ll just stay on the topic off self expression and cover one section of it, emotional expression.
Growing up and creating relationships with the opposite sex, I’ve seen the slim confinements that both sexes have been caste. Feminine and Masculine. I’ve seen on numerous occasions that people have used the terminology of feminine and masculine to describe a person negatively. My biggest concern is the association of expressing ones emotions with the act of femininity.
A couple of years back, I had a debate with one of my older sisters about this very issue of femininity. We were discussing something along the lines of relationships and she described a male who was quite expressive with his emotions as feminine. I then wanted to explore this concept further as she was not the first person I had heard mention this. As you consider a male expressing his emotions as feminine, it instantly creates a negative, degrading cloud over him in our minds. But “why?” I asked, because we have been conditioned to believe these very views, creating separations between the sexes.
This view really irked me. Why do we consider the action of a person to express their emotions openly as a feminine trait? Why should concealing your emotions be considered as a masculine trait? It’s this kind of conditioning from young that creates a continuous cycle of behaviour that I feel is unacceptable. This prevents people for doing the one thing that they have the right to do which is to express yourself. How can you expect to build a greater understanding and better yet, get what you want if you are afraid to express how you feel?!
Whenever I am in conversation with a male and they express how they feel about me or anything for that matter, I give them my high regards of respect because I know how much it must have taken for them to do something that has been identified as a “weak” or “feminine” action.
The commencing of this ideology began when who ever felt that the colour Pink was for a girls and the colour Blue was for boys. Again restricting the genders to maintain an opposing sense of expression, which later stems into males remaining cold and putting on this tough “I have no feelings” exterior, in turn creating a reoccurring deal breaker in most relationships they endeavour.
I will not be passing on any of these generation destroying ideas onto my future offspring because I know better than to forbid any person from allowing them to express themselves how they see fit. The colour example is a cute token but we must be aware of how far we are taking this into the concept of character building.
Guys it is not feminine to express your emotions and girls it is not masculine to be direct and driven. Be true to you in order to get the best for you!
*P.S I knew the Pringles effect would take place*